It was the beer! Honest!
by Wolvertique
Summary: Adult New Year's Eve party at the X-mansion, bringing unexpected results to one and all.
1. The Party Itself

Synopsis/Warning: Take thirteen X-men, keep them drinking for about two hours straight, and then introduce "dirty" Jenga, and something like this story might pop out. Lots of flirting and naughtiness abound. If you dislike these, desist from reading. 

Story Note: This is set in my personal X-Universe. Jean and Hank are a couple, as are Scott and Rogue. Sean Cassidy is still recovering from Moira's death. Kurt is being stalked by a succubus, who is after his body, not his soul. Wolverine is still recovering from Jean's defection to Hank, and Remy is still halfheartedly flirting with Rogue. Kitty and Bobby have been flirting, but nothing more. Professor X has been healed again, and is walking unassisted.

**********************************  
  
The adult New Year's Eve party at the X-Mansion was proceeding on schedule. After steady drinking for about two hours, everyone had a nice buzz on, and Jamie Madrox, the Multiple Man, pulled out the dirty Jenga game. "Come on, everybody!" he shouted. "Who's up for some real fun?"   
  
Pretty soon, everyone other than Rogue, Beast, and Angel had gathered into a circle and the Jenga blocks were set up for the game. The three X-men who were not playing did watch with interest from the sidelines, though.   
  
Bobby pulled the first block out and read it. "Spin around till you're dizzy? Aw, man. Why couldn't I have gotten an interesting one?"   
  
"I'll take it for you, Bobby!" Kitty quickly interjected. She had only reluctantly agreed to play.   
  
"No trades!" Wolverine called. "What you pick is what you get, no matter what."   
  
Bobby fake pouted, and then spun around in a circle till he fell to the floor, crying out "I'm melting! I'm melting..."   
  
Sean drew the next block and read it. "Kiss any person of your choice in the room." He looked around mischievously. Other eyes met and challenged his or looked away, and then he got up. He headed directly for Emma Frost. She stood to meet him, and he gave her a kiss that lasted for thirty seconds. He released her to catcalls, wolf whistles, and clapping. She swayed slightly, then sat and adjusted her miniskirt.   
  
"Have a woman go next!" Rogue called from the sidelines. Betsy nodded and moved her hand to a block. "Speak in a silly British accent for thirty seconds." The group broke into drunken laughter and she sighed. "Bloody waste of time, if you ask me, but here goes. 'Do you have 28 Days in the Samarkand Desert With the Duchess of Kent by A.E.J. Elliott, O.B.E.?'"   
  
Psylocke acquitted herself admirably, and received a round of applause as well. Jamie then nabbed a block and read it smugly. "Kiss everyone in the room. No problem." With a few quick blows, there were twelve Jamies approaching the twelve other X-men in the place. Loud smacking kisses, short fast kisses, and a few soft romantic kisses were exchanged, and Jamie absorbed his clones again. "Once again, I prove there's more than enough of me to go around," he smiled.   
  
"You're a one-man orgy, Madrox, but that's not necessarily a good thing." Wolverine took a block and waited for the response.   
  
Jamie yawned. "Maybe I'll have to prove to all of you that it is."   
  
"Sing a song from a musical," Wolverine read. He looked around, and faces met his expectantly. "Great." He clapped his hands. "Stand up, stand up if you can, everybody."   
  
People got to their feet, some shaking, other than Emma, who was sitting, giggling helplessly into a glass of white wine. He grabbed Kitty first, then whirled from X-man to X-man as he sang, "I'm singing in the rain, just singing in the rain..."   
  
He sat to thundering applause and growled out, "Beat that, Jackman, you poser..."   
  
Kitty snatched a block, her cheeks red from the dance and laughter, and blushed deeper. "Can't I choose another one?" she begged the crowd.   
  
"NO!" everyone yelled back, even those who weren't playing.   
  
She put her piece in place, then put her hands on her waistband. Red as a fire hydrant, she lowered her pants swiftly, spun around once, and then pulled them back up and sat down. She got wolfwhistles and applause.   
  
Kurt, eyes shining with good humor, took a block and sat back down. "Hmmmm..." he said, looking around to make sure people were paying attention to him.   
  
"Hmm, what, mon ami?" Gambit asked.   
  
"Which one to choose, mein freund, which one..." He stared off into space for a moment and then put his block in place. Sean turned it and read it out loud. "Tell us one of your sexual fantasies."   
  
"Well, since you ask so nicely," he bowed, "I shall. I have thought it would be nice to be lying naked on a beach, warmed by the sun, and be surprised by my lover there on the sand...cooled by the wind from the water and serenaded by the gulls as we love each other. I don't know who he, or she, is, but it's very nice."   
  
"She or he?" Kitty giggled.   
  
Kurt smiled. "I haven't ruled out the possibility, though I have never wanted a male lover yet."   
  
Jamie spilled part of his drink. "Then I'm going to see you later tonight. Hell, I'll see all of you later!" he pointed around the room, spilling the rest of his drink in the process.   
  
Through cat-calls, whistles, and a few quiet hopeful looks, Gambit drew a block and read it. "Take off your underwear one-handed, without using your powers to help you. Sure thing."   
  
He moved his hand to his waist, and then stripped his sweatpants and underwear off in one fluid movement. He stood proudly, not trying to hide anything. He separated his underwear from his pants and looked over at Rogue, who was pointedly ignoring him. He shrugged and threw his briefs to Kitty, who shrieked as they hit her and fell to the floor. He put his pants back on and gave the room a wink.   
  
Jamie roared. "I'm definitely seeing YOU later!"   
  
"Not if Gambit see you first, cher!" Gambit screamed back over the crowd, cheerfully.   
  
Ororo reached out to take a piece, but Emma waved the one she had taken while people were reacting to Gambit and Multiple Man. She stood and read, in a "I'm trying to talk as if I'm not as drunk as I am" voice, "Tell someone here something you've never told anyone before." She smiled and beckoned to everyone's favorite target, Kitty.   
  
"No, no, no," Kitty burbled as Wolverine led her over to Emma. "Don't wanna know it, no, no, no..."   
  
Emma gave an almost sweet drunken smile and whispered gently into Kitty's ear. Kitty gasped and leapt back. "It is NOT!" she cried out, looking down at her shoes and blushing.   
  
"I saw," Emma said with drunken dignity. "Ask him yourself."   
  
Kitty's panicked eyes darted to Emma, then back to the floor as she muttered, "Don't want to do that."   
  
"It's true. It is. All the way down." Emma laughed. "Or should that be up? Anyway, it must be a feared wheeling..."  
  
Kitty put her hands over her ears and sat down hard. Ororo quickly jerked a block out of the pile and read it loudly, "Tell everyone in the room why you would have sex with them."   
  
"And tell us how many quarts of beer it'd take, too!" Bobby called from his place by Kitty, where he was trying to get her to tell him what Emma had said.   
  
Storm sighed and tried to get it over with as quickly as possible. She hurriedly listed, "Sean, you're experienced. Beast, your fur looks warm. Angel, we could fly together. Emma, you're also experienced. Jamie, you'd be easy. Rogue, you're not. Kurt, you're charming..." She stopped as the door opened and Professor Xavier stuck his head in. Her face froze and she stared at him.   
  
"Why would you have sex with him, Storm?" called a random drunken fool. Others started asking, too. The professor looked confused and started backing away, and Storm stood like a deer in the headlights for a few seconds.   
  
The chanting stopped and the room grew quiet as Storm violently tossed her head back and forth. In the resulting silence, everyone heard Kitty say, "...to the very tip of his cock, okay?" As heads turned toward Kitty, Storm broke and ran from the room. The professor followed her, Bobby said, "You're kidding!" and Wolverine swept his arms through the Jenga game, knocking down all the blocks. Everyone stared at him. "Oops. My elbow slipped," he said without any trace of humor. "Oh, and I think the party's over." He stalked from the room, and everything broke up. 


	2. Tradition

Storm swept through the mansion, holding her head. Of all people, Charles had to put his head into the room. He had to see her playing that game. He had to be the one to find her.   
  
Sure, they'd been spending a lot of time together lately as friends, especially since he'd been healed. There was no problem with that. Except...   
  
Storm had been telling herself a lot lately that Charles was a good friend. More than would be needed for simple affirmation. Then, when she saw him there and the crowd had called for her to say why she'd choose him...it burst through her like one of her floods. She wanted him, as more than just a friend.   
  
She was also embarrassed. Yes, it was just a silly game and she wouldn't really take any of them there as a lover...yes, she was drunk, but still...what if he thought she was serious? What if he thought she was…  
  
_Storm? Are you all right?_ A gentle touch inside her head, tinged with concern...damn Charles and his telepathy anyhow.   
  
_Yes._ Let him accept it. Goddess, let him believe me.   
  
_I think I should make sure. Would you meet me in my office?_ He was still worried about her.   
  
_Give me a few minutes._ She turned and nearly ran down Wolverine.   
  
"Hello, Ro." He lit one of his awful cigars.   
  
"Must you do that?" she asked, coughing.   
  
He shrugged. "If you'd rather have me keep smelling you without a filter..."   
  
"No. That's all right. Why are you here?" She hugged her chest with her arms.  
  
He cocked his head. "You run off, panicked, embarrassed, and excited, and you have to ask?" He tapped her arm lightly. "Wanted to see if you're okay."   
  
"I'm FINE," she said emphatically.   
  
He nodded to the left, toward the front door. "Blizzard outside says you're wrong."   
  
She forced her shoulders to relax. She breathed in and out four times. Others should not be endangered because she played a game on New Year's. "It and I will calm down."   
  
"Good." He pushed away from the wall. "Talk to him about all of it. It isn't doing you any good to keep it locked inside."   
  
"What?"   
  
"There have been rumors, Storm, about you and the professor." He turned and looked back at her. "I'm the kind who doesn't pay attention to rumors normally, but you just confirmed every one tonight." He walked away jauntily.   
  
Rumors? She walked slowly, trying to calm the storm within and without. It was absurd. There were rumors about everyone. No one took them seriously.   
  
Charles was standing near his window, watching the snow fall outside. He smiled as she entered. "Please close the door," he said softly, still staring out the window.   
  
She did, and he turned toward her. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."   
  
She shook her head. "It was just a silly game. It meant nothing to me."   
  
"No doubt." He took a step in her direction. "Games like that have been played for years, here and other places, and they usually mean little."   
  
"It was just...you startled me." She paused.   
  
"I know." He was closer to her. Had he moved, or had she? _You were leaking all over, Storm...I wasn't sure you weren't speaking out loud at first._ His eyes were deep, fixed on hers.   
  
_Was I?_ She put a hand in front of her, half to touch him and half to keep him away. He took it gently.   
  
_I liked some of what I heard._ Charles never looked at her like that before, but she didn't mind.   
  
He did? He did...well. _Maybe we should re-evaluate our..._ His lips touched hers, and Storm gladly engaged in another old New Year's tradition, kissing in the New Year.


	3. Resistance

Sean nodded to Psylocke and Rogue, the last to leave the room. He sighed. Someone always had to do clean-up after these things. Might as well be him.   
  
_It'd be nice if the Wolverine wasn't so impulsive...scattering the blocks this way_, he thought. He picked up pieces and put them away in the Jenga box, then heard giggling. He looked up.   
  
Emma had Gambit's underwear tangled around her right wrist. She waved at him from the chair she was draped over. "Hi," she said cheerily, then stared at her wrist. "Whoa...the colors..."   
  
He raised an eyebrow, then dropped the Jenga piece he was holding into the box. "Are you all right, Miss Frost?"   
  
She looked at him cunningly. "You weren't near so formal earlier, Mr. Sean Michael Partrick Cassidy, were ye lad?" she said, mocking his Irish accent. "You kissed me. Hard. Wet."   
  
He rolled his eyes. "Emma, then." He put the box down by the fireplace, then got up. "I'll take you to your room."  
  
"Wow." She blinked and tried to stand up. "I didn't think you moved that fast on women...whoo. My neck doesn't work right." Her head lolled back, and she fell down into the chair, leaning her head on the back of it.   
  
"Lord, give me strength," he prayed, lifting Emma into his arms. He had the same thoughts about her everyone did, of course, but he'd never thought she and he would be this close.   
  
She touched his nose. "You know what, Seano?"   
  
"I hate that name," he stated.   
  
She giggled. "Seano, you're kinda cute when I'm drunk. Hey, you're kinda cute anyway."   
  
He rolled his eyes. "Thanks for noticing, finally...how long have we been working together?"   
  
She grinned and tried to pat his face again, but missed. "Oh, I noticed. But you had Mary...Mariah...Moria..."   
  
"Moira?" he interrupted.   
  
"Yeah! Her!" She turned more sober in tone, if not in enunciation. "She died, you know. And you all think I'm evil. It's not easy being me."   
  
Great. A self-pitying telepath was weeping in his arms. She'd probably hate him for having seen her this way tomorrow, too. He couldn't just leave her, though, so he gently said, "Lass, it's not easy being any of us."   
  
She swept a hand out and a telepathic feeler went through his head as he opened the door to one of the guest bedrooms. "Oo, Sean, you naughty, naughty man...aren't you Irish types supposed to be good Catholic boys who never think about..." She started giggling again.   
  
He dropped her on the bed. She gasped out, "Hey!" and bounced a couple of times. He stripped her shoes off and turned to go.   
  
"Wait." He stopped and listened, his back to her. "I thought you'd stay." He looked back. Her face was confused. One strap of her gown was falling off, and she still had Gambit's underwear tightly wrapped around her wrist.   
  
All right. Time for honesty, even if she'd not remember a thing come morning. "You got me, Emma. I do want you." He gracefully stalked toward the bed and pushed her shoulders down onto it. "I want you every way I can have you, again and again, till you're singing with pleasure." He activated his voice powers as he spoke, sending shivers of sensation over her skin. "But I want you sober, awake, yourself, choosing me as Emma, not as Jim Beam. That way, in the morning, you'll still be there. And I won't have you any other way."   
  
She lay back, stunned, as he stood and walked out the door, already regretting what he'd said. He was in for it tomorrow, he knew it. He closed the door, then sagged against it and blew out a breath. No more parties. He was getting too old for this nonsense, anyway.


	4. Long Dry Season

Kurt watched as Rogue deliberately delayed Betsy with some nonsense questions, and as Gambit realized it and left the room. He smiled and made his own exit. Bobby had told him to wait five minutes, then follow him to Kitty's room.

"Kurt?" Kitty came around a corner and walked toward him. He frowned. Bobby hadn't said anything…

She gave a sensual smile and reached for his shoulders. Ah. He finally understood.

"No. Stop it, succubus." Damn her. Why did she always have to spoil his fun?

She pouted. "Would this have been a better form?" she asked, taking the tall blond form of Angel and reaching out to him again.

"Nein. I already told you, the form isn't the problem." He turned and walked away from her. She re-appeared in front of him, taking his naked shape.

"You're not drunk enough," she said, disappointed. "If you were drunk enough…"

He laughed. "Unnamed one, if I were that drunk, I would be no use to you."

She smiled, stretching languidly. "You would be surprised what I could do to make sure you were. This is what I do, how I feed." She slowly shifted into a nude female version of himself and winked. "Want a screwdriver?"

"No." He was, in fact, wishing he had not had so much alcohol tonight already. This was very hard…difficult. Very difficult.

She began stalking toward him, and he teleported into his room. He had believed she had finally given up on him. He hadn't seen her for three weeks. Why did this have to happen?

A brisk knock disturbed his thoughts. "Was ist?" he called. A muffled voice said, "Hey, man, what are you doing?" It was Bobby Drake. Kurt leaped up, then stood for a moment and nodded. He opened the door and stepped back a few paces. Bobby was standing there, a slight smile on his face, wearing some old jeans and a sweater he hadn't worn to the party.

Bobby tried to walk into the room, and the ward at the door activated, exploding into a beam of thousand watt light and hitting "him" in the face. The succubus was blown back across the hall and slammed into the wall with a crash. She shook her head and rose, dark anger on her face. "You don't know how to ward. Who did this, and why did you let them?"

He smiled. "You forgot my mother and sister, didn't you, Margali and Jimaine? You're not crossing their wards to get at me unless you truly have some feelings for me…other than your usual lust, of course."

She snarled. "You can't stay in there forever." She vanished, and Kurt fell onto his bed. He, too, had been surprised by the violence of the ward, but impressed. He sighed and got up to lock the door. His dry spell was not going to end yet, apparently. Too bad.


	5. Careful What You Wish For

"Remy?" His eyes remained on the retreating form of Rogue, heading toward Scott's room again. "Remy?" He turned around.

"Yeah, Psylocke?" He was clearly irritated. She pressed on anyway.

"Do you, perhaps, want some company?" Her eyes shone up at him, and he smiled and looked down the hall, where Rogue had disappeared.

"Chere, I ain't given up yet. If I do, you the first one I call, okay? But right now, I gotta hold off." 

He walked away, and Betsy said, "Bloody hell."

She was disappointed. She hadn't gotten to do anything interesting at the party. Kurt and Bobby had gone after Kitty, Hank was probably going straight back to the lab to get with Jean, Wolverine was probably off somewhere sulking over Jean too, Remy wasn't interested in anyone but Rogue, and Sean and Professor X were just too old. The very idea made her a little sick. That only left Angel, who was probably flying off somewhere and impossible to reach, or Jamie, who was so drunk he probably wouldn't be good for anything. Still, you never know. She went to her room, leaving the door slightly open, and took off her clothes. She clicked on the lamp beside her bed. At least this was a little naughty.

She laid back on her bed and felt like crying, so she started talking to try to cheer herself up. "So Betsy, what's your favorite sexual fantasy, love? Well, Betsy, it has to have someone other than me in it. Really, Betsy? So your favorite one isn't being ignored in favor of a tart who goes sodding off with a boring old stick of a man or being passed over for a twit who probably can't handle one man, much less two men, at once? No, Betsy, it isn't."

"So what is your sexual fantasy, Betsy love?" a deep voice asked. She looked up and saw Jamie in the door, eyes twinkling. He smiled. "Oh, do go on. I wasn't as think as you all drunk I was, and I'm even less think, seeing you lying there."

Finally! She relaxed and started really enjoying herself. "Well, Jamie love, I'd love at least one fella who saw me a bit inebriated take advantage of me right here."

"At least one, Betsy love? Does that mean you're willing to play with more than one?"

"Yes, Jamie love, I'd be glad to. I'm certainly drunk enough." She laughed, and Jamie put his head out of the door. "Come on in, Warren, the water's fine!"

She blinked. "Now, wait just a minute, gentlemen…" she stammered as Angel came in and closed the door. "You can't be…I thought you meant…"

"Just me? Well, Warren and I talked about that, and we both decided what we wanted to do was have all three of us play for a bit. Right, Warren love?"

Angel nodded and grinned lasciviously at Betsy. "Right, Jamie." They approached the bed, and Betsy tensed, then relaxed. After all, this was very nasty…and if she didn't want nasty, she should have been more careful what she wished for, she thought, as she embraced the two men.


	6. Guys' Night Out

As Gambit walked into the kitchen, Wolverine looked up from the glasses he was washing at the sink, nodded, and returned to cleaning the remaining dishes from the earlier party. Gambit couldn't believe the sight of Wolverine, his sleeves rolled up, hands and arms covered in suds, dishtowel carelessly thrown over his shoulder...he smiled, then tried to hold the laughter back. It didn't work, and soon he was howling, pounding the refrigerator door. Wolverine cocked his head and threw a wet dish rag at him. "What?" he growled, making Gambit laugh harder.

Gambit gasped out, "You…dishes…New Year's…"

Wolverine shrugged. "Someone's gotta do them, and I got no plans. How about you?" he returned. "Why aren't you doing something, or someone? You were flirting pretty hard in there."

Gambit quickly sobered up. "Mon ami, when the girl you interested in pays you no mind, it's kinda hard to get into someone else."

Wolverine nodded and bent over the serving dish, wiping it over and over again. "You tried talking to her?"

"You try talking to Jean?" Gambit leaned against the edge of the sink and folded his arms.

Wolverine's eyes flickered, and he nodded. "Good point." He put the dish away and threw the dish towel over a rod.

"Guess I got it easier than you, though, cher. I only got Scott to compete with. You got Hank."

Wolverine rolled his eyes. "Don't remind me. Bastard." He paused. "You, too."

"Hank, a bastard? Tell me. Rubbin' your nose in it, is he?" 

Wolverine turned on Gambit, rage in his eyes, and took a fighting stance. "No. That's the problem. Bastard's so damn understanding and …" His mood changed, and he almost purred, "By the way, how are you dealing with Scott?" His body relaxed and his face took on a smug look. "Like being passed over for the most boring X-man ever? Being ignored for Mr. Straight and Narrow?"

Gambit grabbed a handful of cards and charged them, then thought for a second and laughed instead. "Damn, you fight dirty, Wolverine. Truce?"

"I didn't start anything," he replied, grinning. He sniffed the air once and frowned.

"Trouble?" Gambit put the cards back in his pocket, but kept a hand on them.

Wolverine said, slowly, "No, just a weird mixture." Gambit heard someone walking down the hall, and then smelled the familiar pipe tobacco that Banshee used.

Banshee entered the room and bowed. "Happy New Year, me hungry friends…at least, I'd guess ye are."

"You more than us." Wolverine still had an odd look on his face. Gambit cocked his head.

"Me more than…oh." Sean's eyes lit with understanding, but then his head bowed over his pipe. He became very interested in filling his pipe with more tobacco, though he had quite a bit in there already. "And I'm afraid I wouldn't know what you're talking about at all, would I?"

Wolverine nodded and opened the refrigerator, pulling out some German imported beer. "Breakfast's on me today, Irish. I feel generous."

Gambit pushed two bottles over to him. "Give you a double, cher. Take that edge off."

Sean raised an eyebrow. "It'd take more than that to satisfy what I'm cravin', but I'll take it anyway." He opened both and raised them. "May ye be in heaven an hour before the Devil knows you're dead." He drank heartily.

Gambit put down his bottle. "So we the unlucky ones, huh?"

Sean coughed, and Wolverine said, "Define unlucky."

"You know what I mean." Gambit finished his drink. "Got nothing to do."

"You could always help me repair the power lines in the Danger Room," Sean offered innocently. Wolverine snorted, and Gambit gave him a hard stare.

"I got an idea. Come on." Wolverine grabbed his leather jacket. "We're going to the Auger Inn."

"And where the hell would this be?" Sean asked. 

Gambit grinned. "Cher, it's a great place for a fight. I'm goin'."

Sean stood and stretched. "Now, that's something I can do." The three men left for Salem Center's business district and the good brawl awaiting them.


End file.
